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A revelation from the lesson that revealed to me a fresh viewpoint?
Definitely how to look at the ego. At first I thought of the ego as something to run away from, but then I learned there is nothing wrong with being egoistic, we are the desire to receive. Like flowers in a garden, the ego has to grow naturally and organically with a lot of TLC and the awareness that emerges through contrast with the quality of bestowal. And then it can serve connection, instead of separation.
One thing I got from this lesson is to be able to dial in my fear of increasing desires. Knowing that it comes from a growing point in the heart, all my corporeal pleasures also growing poses less of a problem because I have always been responsible for controlling them so nothing has changes. I feel a big promise from being on the path to correction because it gives me hope for a life without exploitation of others being a final goal, which is similar to the creator’s quality of bestowal.
It seems that our senses limit our contact with reality, locking in our awareness to a physical world. The upper worlds, that do not have confinement of space, time and motion sound almost too overwhelming for our senses to comprehend.
Yet, we are shattered pieces of this one soul, Adam, which comes from this place beyond our senses. Therefore does coming back to the upper force feel like coming home?
I wonder when I feel joy or excitement for contact with the upper force, if this is in fact egoism, until the only emotion that I seem to feel is love for it.
I pray that I can stay with it, to grow with it, to serve its intention to bestow by being the being the best “me” I can be. But then I check again is this my ego talking, but the ego seems less present and there seems only love. Yet, am I writing this to serve my ego? 🙂 Of course!
It starts to feel like a dance with the upper force. I am grateful for the lesson that to have the will to connect to the upper force and to stay within the intention to receive so to bestow. This helps me check my actions by searching my heart.
Understanding that we are on a journey helps me to forgive myself for my mistakes. I find I can be more gentle with myself when I need to make a correction, and find a love for that part of myself that is trying to grow.
I am so grateful for this, as being able to do this for myself helps me be better for others, more patient and understanding for others, that they are on their journey too. I think that simply showing someone that you can recognise this in them, through patience and forgivenesst, can help them to recognise it in themselves as well. And perhaps this might help them come a little closer to a place of love with the upper force.
I think through this I am starting to understand what it means: to do unto others as you would do unto you.
This journey is not over yet, and I will no doubt be tested in my ability to hold this intention. But please know that I will continue to do my best I can, for your sake as well as mine.
I thought from the beginning of the lesson that the solution to self-inflicted issues would be solved by not allowing ego to have access in my decision making but to stop it at the onset. I realize how that it is impossible to counteract it completely and for a good reason. The ego is needed to in order to transcend from this desire of ego to a desire of auteurism through correction.
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