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Learning of how the ego is the program of our five senses, to the point where we do not know what we are perceiving beyond what is being projected to us. Our block from perceiving abstract Light.
This caused me to wonder at everything I am experiencing. All that there is, is the Creator. What am I actually experiencing? What exactly is the Creator? I have my religious views via my culture and upbringing, but, what is He beyond that? He is the will to bestow, we are the will to receiving. We think ourselves opposite to each other (humanity) and we are not. Only the ego perceives it in this light. Beyond the ego, there is abstract Light. Endless possibilities. This drew me to “who am I?,” “Where am I?,” and “where am I going?” Rather than just reading about it as I did a week or two ago, I have these questions arising within my heart now.
I’m swirling from the terminologies but I am connecting with the material insomuch as I am feeling it. Last night I had a dream I was in an everyday world similar to my own until I came in contact with other people. First of all there was no barrier when approaching someone because the coherence was innate. Once contact was made physically and I note it was not sexual in any way, bliss, love, and sensations were so pleasurable that I hesitated with a distinct thought of death. Should I die and be separated from the resonate bliss I could not bear it. I reassured myself that even the thought of that was not enough to prevent me from experiencing the bliss and I surrendered to it once more. Why does this dream standout for me? Because I have never experienced anything like it before. I cannot help but believe that study of Kabbalah is responsible for this. Dreaming has always been the way I receive or process insight in my life. While I cannot recreate the dream experience in my waking life I can incorporate and integrate what I have dreamed as real and this is how I grow and evolve. I am grateful to be here and feel renewed with hope through the study of Kabbalah as it is providing me with a resonance of truth I can experience even if I am struggling with the terminology.
What a beautiful dream, Ellema! It made me wonder if you’d read “Kabbalah and the Power of Dreaming” by Catherine Shainberg (a student of the Israeli Kabbalist, Colette Béatrice Aboulker-Muscat). Thanks to my *ADHD-ness*, I’ve only managed to skim books by Shainberg and Aboulker-Muscat, but some of their exercises have brought my dreams alive.
Have you ever heard of someone seeing clear and or blue, thin transparent specks of light over or next to a word while reading the Zohar? Also, how about the Hebrew letters moving out of position from right to left? These combinations have happened while reading and scanning Volume One about 5 times. I just started Volume Two today. It could be eye strain but I’m going to stop and investigate the letters and words it happens over or next to if it happens again. Thank you.
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