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- Respuestas
I have been reminded again and again through this course that my ticket out of my selfish & egoistic nature is through Kabbalah.
I just hope I can attain it over time…
I feel overwhelmed by desire to reach the upper force to an extent it becomes completely overwhelming and makes me fully frozen and paralyzed due to me not being able to direct the light to that desire.
i truly hope and pray for closeness to the upper light by connection to my fellow seekers on Kab-U
What most inspires me is coming to an understanding of the force behind all of creation. It’s a relief to know that it’s not up to imperfect mankind, the collective ego to make all things right in the world. It explains all the failure I see around me. It inspires me to reach higher, or rather think and feel higher to make the connections necessary to bring a true healing to our world.
Which brings me to the next question…what have I learned about myself. I think the biggest revelation is to understand why I suffered so much. I was horribly spiritually abused in a cult. And, life hasn’t been kind to me. So, I’ve been timid about this learning experience… at first being afraid that I was getting myself served up some more tasteless kookaide. (lol, I misspelled that by accident, but looking at it, yeah, it really does fit). Please don’t take offense. You don’t know the depth of what I’ve gone through. It took me 10 years plus, to start looking outside myself again to trust anyone, any human with my spirituality. I kept praying. I prayed for years. I’m slow at learning out of necessity to take things in as I can assimilate them realistically for myself. I can say my ego was working overtime to heal myself, looking inward to understand how I got so hooked in, but looking up and outside myself with my prayers for answers I still needed to heal my soul.
It’s such a relief to know that their are other souls, or ‘other points in the heart’ that feel the same way I do. It’s a relief now to know that I’m not alone. I’ve been curled up so tight inside my own heart and mind for so many years. I’ve cried, prayed in pain and deep loneliness to find the right way to reach “HIM” the Creator, the Light. Now, I’ve come to a point where I can really start to let go of the pain from a logical, not just emotional point of view. There’s a reason behind everything that happens. It’s not always pleasant, but if we learn from our experience, true healing and the release of emotional pain can happen.
I haven’t fully grasped everything I’ve learned so far, but I’ve learned enough that’s inspired me to keep learning.
What do I want for my fellow students in their spiritual development? One word comes to mind, patience. Be patient with yourself, and be patient with all those around you. Understand that none of us is perfect but we can all come together with mutual love and connection as long as we keep trying, and keep learning. AND! (Before I forget…) WELCOME CONFLICT!–whenever it comes in because working out our conflicts, our differences is the way we grow above our own egos, and truly grow spiritually together.
It brought me a lot of clarity but at the same time it also raised a million questions. The problem is that when I try to formulate these questions in words, however I am doing it, when I read the question it does not reflect the exact feeling of my question and I just can’t put it in words (not related to the language 🙂 . Sometimes, a question pops-up and immediate I have an answer – it is like I am replying to myself – and I feel that it is so obvious, how is it that I did not think of it before….. Anyway, I am proceeding with my studies, and will see about the questions… I am sure that some of them will be answered as I proceed.
I wish to all my fellow students clarity and perseverance – even if sometimes you feel confused or do not understand everything, just go on and don’t give up.
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