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I am much better at seeing negative experiences in my life as good from the Creator. This is a real blessing. However, I still find myself bargaining with the creator in order to improve my corporeal circumstances. Once I realize what I am thinking, I stop. Does one get to a point where this no longer happens?
Rita,
This is normal and this is how the vessel grows.
At my current degree I perform an act of bestowal, then my intellect scrutinizes the act and I discover that actually I want to derive some benefit from the action, then I need to turn to the Upper Force for a higher light to correct me.
And we repeat this over and over again.
This keeps us always renewing and always turning to the Upper One.
Seth@KabU
Is the middle line like a sensation? a type of sensation that we never feel in our day to day life?
The way I understood the description is that it’s a little bit like doing something you don’t really want to do, but you do it anyway because it’s the right thing to do.
Chris,
Our life and our world are built of two lines. Hot & cold, in & out, up and down, fire and water.
Those things cannot live together in the physical world it is either hot or cold, not hot and cold, together they cancel each other.
In spirituality there is an additional phenomenon where the opposites live together in harmony, that is called the middle line, where everything is together in one integral whole. It’s not ‘natural’ it’s “supernatural”.
Seth@KabU
Please clarify this for me, it’s stated that you can still be in your religion and still be studying Kabbala. What if the things you are being exposed to contradicts the the religion you are in, should you stop or something do something else? On my side i have stopped because i felt I don’t belong there.
Lucy,
This is a personal choice for each person.
The intent here is to say that the wisdom of kabbalah is a science of spiritual attainment. A person learns who she is, what forces operate her and the world that she lives in.
I understand that with this knowledge many of the things that we were taught in the past fall away as they lose meaning. However the cultures of the world should not be disregarded and discarded only that all of the people will come to know how they can come into contact with their Maker.
Seth@KabU
I think the ultimate  goal is a “complete desire and “a clear line”. Those words stopped me dead in my tracks. I read your advise to other, take it slow, hang in.
Is it possible to have a complete desire in small things, unlike the ultimate? As an example, I really want to read this passage, or I really want to be there for someone. Is the “complete desire” only reserved for complete arrival at the ultimate?
in the past 5 month I have been taking care of my parents outside of the country who are both sick. I was away from my own families and work. I tried so hard to practice bestowing towards my parents, I only found myself hurt mentally and physically. I know this is the time to pray for the light to lift me to another capacity level. my questions are: 1. how do I know the light is working on me? 2. will this practice of bestowing put me at a position of being taken advantage by others (even my own parents). I guess the 2nd question shows my “will to receive” nature but before I have the equivalence of form, how do I balance things? Â thank you very much!
Helen,
A kabbalist lives in two worlds.
It will be very helpful for you to find this line between the two worlds, below the line, you operate in this world like a normal person operates, food, water, family, work, culture, all the normal things that we need to do in this world.
And above the line is our inner world, our spiritual connection, our intention.
It sounds like you don’t have this line and you are mixing up these things.
We are living in a world of egoists, we don’t need to judge, we need to understand it and work with it correctly.
We already know what it is and that this is how each one operates. Just because you go and pour your heart out to another does not mean they will reciprocate, to the contrary, they may enjoy taking from you.
If you are working to bestow, this is in the heart. Become a craftsman of the soul and learn how to work between these levels.
Good luck,
Seth@KabUwow, this first sounds like nonsense, now it starts to make sense. initially I thought the reason to have a spiritual life is to help us live in this world like the Creator. that was a naive thought isn’t it? Â I guess what you are saying is that though learning Kabbalah, we work on our desires, which often are very hidden, require self-analysis, while we are correcting our inner desires, not necessarily we apply that to this world because it would “kill” us. Â But, wouldn’t this also mean that we are a fake good person? We know what good to do but we choose to not do it in real life? I thought practicing Mitzvot is very important? Â thank you Instructor!
Helen,
If everyone is a fake person anyway, so why not fake that you want to be loving like the Creator. Fake it until it becomes real. This is how it works in nature. Do you give a child a real baby to play with? A real car to drive? A real building to build? Even with animals, dogs, cats, we see them play when they are young, this is how they learn.We are and will be until the end of correction, a desire to receive.
That is by design. The Creator wants to fill us so we need to want to be filled.
Our correction is in receiving not for our own sake, for the sake of the ego, but that we receive in order to bestow back to Him/upon all of creation.
Seth@KabU
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