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Hm…
So what I take from this is that the advice for my mind is: “Do whatever, know that it is the Creator, blame it on Him and know that it is just another tactic of the ego that He is trying to make me aware of”.
This helps me to focus on my heart instead of the mind.
While reading this reply, somebody on the streets complained about vaccine-deniers very angrily to my neighbours. I think: “But hey man. Do you realise that you are complaining about their anger while being engulfed in the same kind of anger?” Which, frankly, makes me angry a little bit.
Same situation. I think that I could help calm him down a bit, but also it is not really any of my business. For now, however, I put on some Jazz in my headphones and ignore him. Choosing my environment is after all the only spiritual calculation I am quite sure of.
Let’s see if that is what the Creator wants of me for now. I can only work on my level and I believe He never expects more of me.
I hope that None Else Besides Him will punch me in the face one way or another if I misunderstood somehow.
I have a question about responsibility and guilt.
For the past two years, I have been confronted with similar situations on multiple fronts. Only now did I realise that my main driving force behind many behaviours is guilt. The situations are always the same. I see where something is headed and I have ideas how to prevent it or how to better it. At the same time, it is not really quite my business. So, in order to change anything I would have to go out of my way.
It feels like realising this is a good first step and now the Creator will probably not have to show me these situations on so many fronts at the same time. After all, I will be attentive and willing to look at one situation to learn what I need to learn.
I know that Kabbalah does not speak of morals. It does not say whether I should feel guilty for something or not and it talks about corporeal actions even less. I also understand that whatever my decisions in these situations are, they will always be the result of an egoistical calculation. I cannot outsmart that and so I do not try to fool myself.
Still, I want to know what Kabbalah has to say about guilt and about responsibility. Is there something that I can do with this emotion as long as I do not yet have a TEN?
Thank you very much for this answer.
While waiting for the course “Kabbalah in Action” to start, I read a bit in “Shamati (I Heard)”. It was very uncomfortable because it almost feels like the book attacks me personally. At one point I despaired because everything felt hopeless (especially trying to outsmart my ego somehow).
I often had the thought that I want to just stop trying to transcend my ego because it is impossible anyhow. However, I thought that this is what my ego wants to convince me of.
It is a great relief for me to know that for now, I simply have to expose myself to the KabU environment regularly. I will do that to the best of my ability because all my “instruments of navigation” that I have built throughout the past two years consistently lead me back to KabU anyway.
It makes sense to me that my heart changes through the resonance with this environment and because of those changes my mind will change. At least after the live events I am usually pleasently calm (and sometimes dead-tired). Something I don’t experience too often.
Thank you very much for your answer 🙂 (I read the answer to this post nonetheless because probably it is a bit premature to try applying the wisdom of Kabbalah practically. Feedback is very important to me because I have the tendency to fall into “faith below reason” instead of “faith above reason”. Let’s avoid that.)
I realise now how entangled corporeal actions and intentions are in my story. Back then, it was only half-clear to me that it is only about the intention and never about the physical action. However, in this particular instance, something truly extraordinary happened. My physical action happened with a pure intention of giving without calculation for self-benefit. At the very least, for about two seconds.
You are right, however, that it is not so important to analyze this experience anymore because I am with you guys now and I will find out, if Kabbalah delivers on its promises.
As for the “physical necessity” part. I do have shelter and enough money for normal life right now. The Creator kept me above water back then by giving me an unexpected large sum of money through the stock market. I tried joining monasteries etc. but my heart simply wouldn’t let me. Now I realise that it was all to prepare me for Kabbalah. Since I can be quite passionate I needed to run full-force into various different directions, think about life myself and try out my various theories. When I found Kabbalah, I was very relieved to find out that none of this fasting, homelessness etc. is necessary.
Now, I am in the process of rebuilding my life step-by-step. Yesterday, in “Kabbalah Explained Simply”, Lio gave me the advice to establish a bit structure and routine in my life again. So this is where I will begin.
