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What should our feeling be toward our friends who are not points in the heart? I have a group of friends whom I am very close with and have known for a long time. But I struggle to relate to them sometimes because their desires seem to not match mine and I feel frustration and sometimes resentment toward their complacency with material/worldly living. Should I still try to connect with them? Or does only our connection towards other points in the heart matter? In other words, is any effort put toward connecting with non points in the heart wasted and doomed to futility?
Hi Branden,
Friend (Haver in Hebrew) comes from the word connection (Hibur in Hebrew). So when we say “friend” in Kabbalah, we’re not talking about our corporeal acquaintances & buddies, but specifically the Kabbalistic group in which people are aspiring towards a spiritual connection within which we reveal the Creator.
As for your corporeal acquaintances, it’s not my place to tell you what to do there. But in general, I wouldn’t recommend to make big changes in your corporeal life. I would recommend to simply set aside some time to regularly return to the source of the light, meaning the Kabbalistic lessons, books, videos, etc. From that you’ll begin to relate to everything else in life in a very balanced way.
And of course remember that “there is no coercion in spirituality”. So don’t pressure anyone to engage in spirituality if they are not ripe for it.
Albert @ KabU
Hello, I would like to ask for clarification on some of the terminology. I apologize in advance that my posting may appear long; however, your indulgence is appreciated because I really want to understand what is being said/meant in our lessons. I will place headings at the start of each topic area for ease of navigation.
Will vs. Desire (1 or 2 questions)
As it pertains to our learning in Kabbalah, do the words “will” and “desire” mean the same thing? In other words, can the terms “will to receive” and “desire to receive” be used interchangeably? If they are not the same meaning, can you please explain what is the difference between “will” and “desire” as Kabbalistic terms?
Corrections, Intentions, Desires (5 questions)
In this lesson, we are told that a correction occurs when we transform the intention to receive into an intention to bestow. In this regard, what we are changing is the intention, not the desire or behavior. First question: Is this accurate? If not, will you explain?
Recently, a classmate expressed difficulty in understanding how the intention for the desire to smoke could be changed from reception to bestowal. He was told, as an example, that he could be part of a group and commit to not smoking as a form of giving toward the benefit of others in the group. In this example, however, it is neither the “intention” nor the “desire” that is being “corrected.” Rather, it is the behavior of smoking that is being changed to “not smoking.” Moreover, the behavior of not smoking goes against both desire (wanting to smoke) and intention (for personal pleasure). In essence, he would commit to sacrificing something he enjoyed for the benefit of others. This seems like the path of pain.
Second Question: Rather than trying to suppress (or sacrifice) our physical desires (such as smoking, drinking alcohol, eating greasy foods, etc.), should we just keep reading Kabbalistic books and following the courses offered through KabU? If not a simple “yes,” can you offer guidance?
It seems to me that we are being taught through Kabbalah that we, as individuals, are powerless to change the objects of our desire (wanting to smoke) on our own. But, if we join a group, our desires will begin to change. Third Question: Is this accurate? If not, will you elaborate?
Fourth Question:Â If we continue feeling the new/additional desire for adhesion with the Creator and we choose to continue our pursuit through authentic Kabbalistic learning, how will our abilities to derive pleasure from base activities, such as smoking, drinking, over-eating, etc., change (or will they)?
Fifth Question: If we study the Path of Reception offered through Kabbalah, will Ohr Makif (Light surrounding the Kli) eventually become Ohr Pnimi (Light received inside the Kli) so that we (individuals) become transformed beings who experience pleasurable fulfillment, while still living in this world, and who no longer wish to conduct ourselves in unhealthy, egoic ways?
Thank you for your patience, guidance, and kind attention to my mind-gnawing questions.
Many smiles…
Dyrk
Hi Dyrk,
Will vs Desire: As a rule of thumb, when the English words get confusing, it’s best to look at the Hebrew originals from which these things get translated. Both will to receive and desire to receive come from the Hebrew words: רצון לקבל – ratzon lekabel. So they are the same and used interchangeably.
1. Yes, we only change the intention. The desire to receive will always remain the same desire to receive, but it’ll be used in order to bestow. Meaning receiving with the intention to bestow. Check out the guest & host analogy in Chapter 3 of Attaining the Worlds Beyond for more details on that: http://www.kabbalah.info/eng/content/view/frame/4180?/eng/content/view/full/4180&main
2&3. Kabbalah only deals with our desire for spirituality. Regarding the desires of our animalistic bodies, Kabbalah does not deal with these things. Our corporeal desires don’t have any relation to spirituality, so each person can arrange these desires however is most comfortable for them (of course within the context of the law and without harming others). As for the desire for spirituality, this is possible to fulfill only in a group with others who have the same goal. We’ll learn more about these things in the more advanced lessons.
As for our corporeal desires, we don’t need to suppress or sacrifice them. We only need to work on making the desire for spirituality the most important thing. Then naturally the rest of our desires will fall into place. For example, it’s like with an artist that is so involved in his art, that he fulfills all the rest of his desires out of necessity so he can quickly return to his passion. Same with us, when spirituality is the most important desire, then we will be able to properly relate to all the rest of our corporeal desires in a balanced way.
4. Usually when we first reach Kabbalah, we lose taste in all the pleasures in life that we couldn’t care less if the world burned down, all we want is to fulfill our point in the heart. Later on, these other desires will begin to intensify more and more, and we will derive even greater pleasures from these things than before. These desires will begin to obscure our point in the heart and give us room to grow spiritually, meaning to make that point in the heart even more important than all these basic things. But these are already advanced stages of our development which we’ll learn about in the more advanced semesters.
5. Yes, you can say that. It’s important to note that Kabbalists are not monks. They don’t abstain from receiving pleasures. They don’t disconnect themselves from the corporeal world. Rather they continue to exist on the level of this world throughout the entire spiritual ladder of development.
Albert @ KabU
Thank you, Albert, for your prompt and clarifying reply to my cascade of questions. You have helped relax the wheels in my mind quite a bit, especially with…
“Kabbalah only deals with our desire for spirituality. Regarding the desires of our animalistic bodies, Kabbalah does not deal with these things.”
and…
“These (corporeal) desires will begin to obscure our point in the heart and give us room to grow spiritually, meaning to make that point in the heart even more important than all these basic things.”
Your second point is where I feel I find myself now in returning to this work. : )
I will re-read Chapter 3 in Attaining the Worlds. Many thanks for the link (and, I recently received my hard copy. [thumb’s up!])
Again, thank you!
Many good days…
Dyrk
Hi Dyrk,
Will vs Desire: As a rule of thumb, when the English words get confusing, it’s best to look at the Hebrew originals from which these things get translated. Both will to receive and desire to receive come from the Hebrew words: רצון לקבל – ratzon lekabel. So they are the same and used interchangeably.
1. Yes, we only change the intention. The desire to receive will always remain the same desire to receive, but it’ll be used in order to bestow. Meaning receiving with the intention to bestow. Check out the guest & host analogy in Chapter 3 of Attaining the Worlds Beyond for more details on that: http://www.kabbalah.info/eng/content/view/frame/4180?/eng/content/view/full/4180&main
2&3. Kabbalah only deals with our desire for spirituality. Regarding the desires of our animalistic bodies, Kabbalah does not deal with these things. Our corporeal desires don’t have any relation to spirituality, so each person can arrange these desires however is most comfortable for them (of course within the context of the law and without harming others). As for the desire for spirituality, this is possible to fulfill only within a group of others with the same goal. We’ll learn more about these things in the more advanced lessons.
As for our corporeal desires, we don’t need to suppress or sacrifice them. We only need to work on making the desire for spirituality the most important thing. Then naturally the rest of our desires will fall into place. For example, it’s like with an artist that is so involved in his art, that he fulfills all the rest of his desires out of necessity so he can quickly return to his passion. Same with us, when spirituality is the most important desire, then we will be able to properly relate to all the rest of our corporeal desires in a balanced way.
4. Usually when we first reach Kabbalah, we lose taste in all the pleasures in life that we couldn’t care less if the world burned down, all we want is to fulfill our point in the heart. Later on, these other desires will begin to intensify more and more, and we will derive even greater pleasures from these things than before. These desires will begin to obscure our point in the heart and give us room to grow spiritually, meaning to make that point in the heart even more important than all these basic things. But these are already advanced stages of our development which we’ll learn about in the more advanced semesters.
5. Yes, you can say that. It’s important to note that Kabbalists are not monks. They don’t abstain from receiving pleasures. They don’t disconnect themselves from the corporeal world. Rather they continue to exist on the level of this world throughout the entire spiritual ladder of development.
Albert @ KabU
I can sense within me the conflict of trying to comprehend all this with my mind and the spiritual desire to learn. It doesn’t always make sense in my mind, it wants to rationalise from the catalogue of experiences and beliefs I have been conditioned with. Is this part of the steps in correction?
Hi Denise,
That is normal. Each one of us is hardwired differently. There are those that are more inclined to feel things and there are those that are more inclined towards trying to understand things. The important thing is to just keep going. To keep placing yourself under the influence of the light and it’ll balance everything out and make all the necessary corrections on us.
Check out this blog post from Rav Laitman for more details:Â http://laitman.com/2013/02/sunbathing-in-the-rays-of-the-reforming-light/
Albert @ KabU
May you please expound more on the corrected desire? For example, I applied for a job that I really like and I really need but I don’t get accepted —- I try to “see/think” what could be the thought of the Creator behind this perceived failure? Sort of like trying to see the big picture behind this challenge?  What happens next? how is this desire corrected?
Hi Maricor,
We learn that there was a shattering in the system of Adam HaRishon. This is the network of connections between us. This was the only thing that got corrupted in the entire system so this is the only thing we need to correct. This means that our entire work is to restore the connections between us. That’s it.
In other words, correction is not in me, rather, correction is in my connection to others. Just picture that all of humanity is part of an 8 billion piece jigsaw piece. Each piece by itself is perfect. We don’t need to recolor or cut of any parts. The only thing we need to do is find where each piece fits relative to all the other pieces.
We’ll learn how to do this practically in the more advanced lessons. In the meantime, check out this blog post from Rav Laitman:Â Â http://laitman.com/2014/05/puzzle-adam-harishon/
Albert @ KabU
<p style=”text-align: left;”>Ok, so since each correction appears in every individual in this world as soon as one individual performed it, taken together with the fact that I experience myself to be completely uncorrected, I can conclude that no single correction in anyone had ever taken place since my fall. Does it mean that without my own efforts the rest of humanity is worthless? What have you beein doing all these years?</p>
Hi Eliyahu,
We learn that “there is no coercion in spirituality”. Meaning that no one can perform the correction on your behalf. But if someone performs their correction, it makes it easier for others to make their correction. Just picture that all of humanity is part of a 8 billion piece jigsaw puzzle. Each person is responsible for his own piece. Meaning that I cannot place someone else’s piece, but if I find where my piece fits, it makes it easier for others to find where their piece fits.
Regarding seeing the corrections, as we learned in the lesson on the perception of reality, the entire external world is nothing more than a reflection of my uncorrected egoistic state. Meaning that I don’t experience some objective reality, but I experience something through the lens of my ego. Furthermore, to the extent that I correct this ego, to that extent the external reality will change as well. It’s like I have these dirty glasses through which I see the whole world as being dirty. The moment I clean my own glasses (correct myself) then I’ll look at the same world, but now it’s clean and perfect.
Check out this blog post from Rav Laitman for more details: http://laitman.com/2014/04/in-neutral-gear/
Albert @ KabU
Taking these lessons, reading the books and watching many of the available videos, I am stirred up.
On one hand I am very excited to evolve in my predifined path, correcting my egoistic ways so that I become one with the creator. It feels absolutely that this is what I need to and want to do.
On the other hand I am scarred that doing so will make my corporeal life even more difficult. It is increasingly more and more difficult to make a living so I am concerned about paying the bills and be a good provider for my family.
I am not clear about how to incorporate the teachings into my day to day life in a way that I am not only advancing my spiritial journey but also improving my corporeal life not just for myself but also for my family, friends and my larger network of people.
Your insight into managing this duality of “existence” would be much appreciated.
Hi Attila,
The Kabbalists tell us “no flour, no Torah – no Torah, no flour”. Meaning a Kabbalist continues to exist on the level of this world throughout the entire spiritual ladder. So I cannot just turn into a monk and disconnect from this life and only focus on spirituality. On the other hand, if I only focus on corporeality, then I’m no different than an animal. So the important thing is to find the right balance between the two: to take care of all of one’s normal necessities: to work, take care of the family, health, etc (this is called flour) and to set aside some time to focus on spirituality (this is called Torah).
As for incorporating the teachings, keep in mind that the spiritual work of bestowal that Kabbalah is talking about is first of all internal. And secondly, if there is an external expression to this inner work, then it’s done only within this safe environment that we call the Kabbalistic group. With the rest of the world, we need to act normal, just like everyone else.
Albert @ KabU
I don’t know if it’s ok if i post into other users questions. My intention is to connect and add my desire. I am facing the same issue. I don’t even know if I will still have a home next month. This already happened a couple of years ago. I really have a desire for my brother Attila, myself, and others like us to receive a satisfying solution, if onmy for the purpose to continue on our path. Thank you.
Thank you Aliyahu for leaving your post. My intent is that as I find ways to improve my corporeal existance – while I advancing my spiritual awakening- I create opportunities for others as well. This is with the intent of providing others a way to make a meaningful living.
So instead of just satisfying my own selfish needs, I focus on doing things in such a way that my actions benefit the greater good of our society and all of its members.
Thank you Aliyahu for leaving your post. My intent is that as I find ways to improve my corporeal existance – while I advancing my spiritual awakening- I create opportunities for others as well. This is with the intent of providing others a way to make a meaningful living.
So instead of just satisfying my own selfish needs, I focus on doing things in such a way that my actions benefit the greater good of our society and all its members.
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