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I could clearly separate my intention and feelings … listening to both versions brought up some old memories, different ones respectively, mostly painful ones, then parallel with that I could keep my intention to wanting the reforming light but all I felt was triggers, discomfort. I know and accept that all is coming from the Creator, is it like “we have to feel it to heal it” … that the reforming light is shining on those past pains and we consciously have to process them to move forward? I have the urge to go back and listen multiple times … I will, see/feel if something shifts or changes? I want it to 💗 …
Hi, I’m Eva, I am just slowly getting to the end of Kabbalah in Action course, and “wrestling” with lots of resistance. The initial flow came to a full stop – I no longer feel I’m getting the answers I’m seeking and feels like eating me from inside. I got drawn to this course hoping to get some grip, to create a crack for the light to enter the resistance, learn how to read correctly, listen, connect, whatever it takes to get back “on track”. I’m hoping to “befriend” this hopeless feeling and learn to work with it instead of against it.
I loved everything, I flew through the whole course in 2 days. Usually it is so hard for me to write comments and reflect, but here!? It came easy and with flow. Many of these concepts were familiar to me and so looking forward digging deeper into the network of connection, the incredibly intelligence of our body , how it is capable to sense and navigate the human network through our incredibly “high tech” nervous system, if we master – both scientifically and experientially – the “program language” of it, and use it’s full potential, we totally, really can sense into each other on visceral level. When that conscious level of bio-neuro-chemical connection happens, I imagine we complete the goal of Creation, all the puzzle pieces get into place 💞🧩🥰
We are completely hardwired by the environment on our automatically functioning nervous system level, just as animals are, but in a self-destructive way and these autonomic connections are “running the show”, our lives. Our higher, logical/reasoning function is focused only on the already formed, “faulty” program and is disconnected from the rest our more primitive, yet highly intelligent, nature developed, automatic functions – just the fact how much complex, biochemical function is going on after we eat a meal to transform the food into energy? Super complex and intelligent work, yet we do not have to think and reason and calculate with our higher brain to do it, goes automatically. We have to turn our higher brain potential to observe, understand and re-integrate the survival functions into everyday life. Then we might be able to start seeing/perceiving how we are influenced by our environment and rewire or re-program ourselves to make positive changes to match the evolutionary force.
More often then I am comfortable with; when very strong egoistic people who are using the ego’s full force for self benefit insult me, I alway freeze. Have no ability to flight neither to fight back, so just simply turn into a freeze mode. When threat lifts I slowly come back to my senses and all becomes clear how I could’ve defend myself or stand up for myself, all “smart” assertive scenarios running through my mind, but is too late. Then shame, self judgement, resentment and/or anger flushes my whole body, I feel it running in my bloodstream. For few years now I am learning how to safely release/heal trapped survival energies that might be lurking inside me since birth or even in-utero, through somatic experiencing – relatively new method. The study brought me to neuro plasticity, polivagal theory and epigenetic inheritance. Very educational/ practical work I find it important/useful to do along the study of Kabbalah. Trapped and unhealed survival energies are powerful and damaging if not dealt with properly.
