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Gianni,
In my notes I have what appears to be another conflict:
One note says that Bina is the highest place Malchut can move to.
The other says that we go no higher than ZON de Atzilut.
Is it 2 ways of saying the same thing since ZON of Atzilut ultimately extends from SAG (Bina)?
It seems to me that once a few details are worked out, they are both saying the same thing ..
Or are my notes a mess?
Hi Michael,
We want to be integrated in ZON of Atzilut, but afterwards ZON also rises to Bina. These are different corrections. There’s also a perspective that we can’t rise higher than Bina because our root is Bina.
if our soul/ we passed through so many layers of upper worlds, and fell to this world because we still have somehow certain level of desire on receiving in previous mentioned upper worlds (as if we receive we become opposite to the Light, and if we don’t receive we empty), how can we ensure the same stories not happening in our world now?
(we are still as before, can’t 100% not receiving, what we can do is to give appreciation to the Creator while we receiving, no?)To tell what state I’m in, I have to ascend a bit above this world. But Kabbalists tell us where we are – in the last degree after falling gradually to greater and greater desires to receive until the point where there’s no Screen over the desire, which means no Light, no pleasure. There’s just a bare minimum to keep us alive as no one can live without pleasure. This pleasure is so tiny that it’s not considered receiving. I can’t bestow by it. It is not the pleasure intended in the Thought of Creation, it’s just sustenance to keep us living until we will learn what the meaning of life is and the method to reach it.
I see, many thanks!
when the vessel were in the upper world, the vessel receive only when there is intension to give the LIght pleasure, so there are no shame in vessel.
What’s the difference now when we are in this imaginary world? we still the same , can only receive light when we wanting the Light to manifest her sharing wants. Am i right to say in this way?
The difference is that we don’t get to decide if we can receive or not without shame. Instead, the conditions under which we could receive and not feel shame have been predetermined. And we will not feel any Light in our Vessel, ever – unless we are already in equivalence of form with the Upper Light. Meaning I need to already be in an intention to bestow to Him. Otherwise, it is just guaranteed, from Above, that I can’t make any mistakes. I can make mistakes, but they won’t result in Shame. Shame is something that we do not know. It’s never been felt in our world (even though everything we do is to avoid it). It’s not “sharing”, as you say – that’s a concept formulated in a way that it is as if egoists can start bestowing right away, in their egoistic Vessels. I’d discard that idea and start over. Realistically, it’s not going to work because that isn’t the approach to the Upper World. I need to first head towards bestowal. To do that I need to learn what bestowal is and where it’s possible. Later, I’ll learn how I can use my Vessels in the direction of bestowal, while my current vessels (1) Can’t be used to bestow, and (2) are also not considered Vessles of reception and therefore I don’t need to feel bad that I am receiving in them. They are considered receiving in the sense that a cow is receiving grass and water. I am not even dealing with real pleasures yet. Because I do not know how to deal with real pleasures yet. If I do what I should do in the state that I am in, then I will be trusted with real pleasures.
Hi Gianni
When I heard that this work needs to be done in groups of ten, some part of me was immediately resistant. So resistant that it has taken me several weeks to ask about it. Right now as I type this I have tears on my face and high anxiety level just from asking you about this. I feel like I’m about to fall off a cliff. I’m introverted by nature but don’t usually have problems with meeting or talking to people, but I feel anxiety about this group. I know I have to do this work and can’t walk away.
Have you any thoughts or experience of what might be happening here? Any insight you can give is appreciated.
Tracey
Of course I understand, Tracey. I can barely stand the presence of my own blood relatives, let alone anyone else, not to mention anyone across the internet with whom I have no apparent reason to connect. I practically don’t value any human interactions, and don’t even get me started on small talk. For me, to have lunch with someone else requires serious preparation to imitate the kinds of expressions and actions that make people think you like being in their company. In truth, if you put me in a private jail cell, but with books, I’d be ok for the rest of my life. I don’t think you’re that antisocial.
Needless to say, when I came to the wisdom of Kabbalah I did not come to connect. In fact, I disregarded any mention of it as some sort of extraneous relic of some, perhaps, Jewish moral code that was irrelevant to the core of the wisdom. In short, it’s nearly impossible for anyone to be as introverted, anitsocial, arrogant and dense as I was.
It is natural, by the way, for a person with great spiritual potential to be anti-connection. It doesn’t matter if it manifests in arrogance or shyness or angst. The Will To Receive, the more pronounced it’s opposite will turn out to be – that is, the more potential it has for the quality of the Creator, bestowal – the more aimed inward it will be. Meaning, it’s a heavier will to receive. If I have a small will to receive, I can flutter about like a butterfly, I can go out to others easily and practically without even a clear reason to. But if I have a big desire to receive for self, I will be decisively aimed inward, not out towards others. And that’s why, in a (seeming contradiction) spiritual work can be – I don’t want to say easier but…it will be sharper. Because my ego doesn’t allow me to go towards others without a clear purpose. Nothing short of the goal of Creation, that through this action I’ll reveal the Upper Worlds, will suffice. This also means that before I do an action of connection, I will have to line up all the reasons I’m doing so and what I want from this action. This is very important.
All that said, you’ll find that the group work is not like any interaction you’ve had with others. It’s purposeful, very directed. We know exactly what we’re doing – it’s a kind of a game that we all know we’re playing. I or another instructor will be there with you. There’s really nothing to fear.
Thank you Gianni. This was very helpful. I’ve been making excuses as to why I can’t participate, like the lack of technology to take part in zoom sessions, and, like you, I initially attributed the method itself to some old tradition that wasn’t that relevant. I understand, at least on the surface, why the group is necessary and why I have been “pushed” here. There is nothing more important than doing this work.
I have a ton of other questions but I will ask them later. Thank you again, Gianni.
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