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I have a question about responsibility and guilt.
For the past two years, I have been confronted with similar situations on multiple fronts. Only now did I realise that my main driving force behind many behaviours is guilt. The situations are always the same. I see where something is headed and I have ideas how to prevent it or how to better it. At the same time, it is not really quite my business. So, in order to change anything I would have to go out of my way.
It feels like realising this is a good first step and now the Creator will probably not have to show me these situations on so many fronts at the same time. After all, I will be attentive and willing to look at one situation to learn what I need to learn.
I know that Kabbalah does not speak of morals. It does not say whether I should feel guilty for something or not and it talks about corporeal actions even less. I also understand that whatever my decisions in these situations are, they will always be the result of an egoistical calculation. I cannot outsmart that and so I do not try to fool myself.
Still, I want to know what Kabbalah has to say about guilt and about responsibility. Is there something that I can do with this emotion as long as I do not yet have a TEN?
Thank you very much for this answer.
While waiting for the course “Kabbalah in Action” to start, I read a bit in “Shamati (I Heard)”. It was very uncomfortable because it almost feels like the book attacks me personally. At one point I despaired because everything felt hopeless (especially trying to outsmart my ego somehow).
I often had the thought that I want to just stop trying to transcend my ego because it is impossible anyhow. However, I thought that this is what my ego wants to convince me of.
It is a great relief for me to know that for now, I simply have to expose myself to the KabU environment regularly. I will do that to the best of my ability because all my “instruments of navigation” that I have built throughout the past two years consistently lead me back to KabU anyway.
It makes sense to me that my heart changes through the resonance with this environment and because of those changes my mind will change. At least after the live events I am usually pleasently calm (and sometimes dead-tired). Something I don’t experience too often.
Thank you very much for your answer 🙂 (I read the answer to this post nonetheless because probably it is a bit premature to try applying the wisdom of Kabbalah practically. Feedback is very important to me because I have the tendency to fall into “faith below reason” instead of “faith above reason”. Let’s avoid that.)
I realise now how entangled corporeal actions and intentions are in my story. Back then, it was only half-clear to me that it is only about the intention and never about the physical action. However, in this particular instance, something truly extraordinary happened. My physical action happened with a pure intention of giving without calculation for self-benefit. At the very least, for about two seconds.
You are right, however, that it is not so important to analyze this experience anymore because I am with you guys now and I will find out, if Kabbalah delivers on its promises.
As for the “physical necessity” part. I do have shelter and enough money for normal life right now. The Creator kept me above water back then by giving me an unexpected large sum of money through the stock market. I tried joining monasteries etc. but my heart simply wouldn’t let me. Now I realise that it was all to prepare me for Kabbalah. Since I can be quite passionate I needed to run full-force into various different directions, think about life myself and try out my various theories. When I found Kabbalah, I was very relieved to find out that none of this fasting, homelessness etc. is necessary.
Now, I am in the process of rebuilding my life step-by-step. Yesterday, in “Kabbalah Explained Simply”, Lio gave me the advice to establish a bit structure and routine in my life again. So this is where I will begin.
I want to build up routines in my life, so that I can study Kabbalah in a steady pace, whether I feel like it or not.
Beyond that, I hope that None Else Besides Him leads me ever more towards “love thy others as thyself”.
Throughout this course I felt that I have already come a bit closer to the Kabbalistic environment and connected to some of my fellow students.
What inspires me most is the way in which Kabbalists relate to their lives. It is a difficult thing for me to understand. I am used to advancing through pain and actually started seeking pain because I thought that it is necessary. Perhaps it isn’t.
I wish to my fellow students that their path in life from this point forward is an “exciting journey; a voyage of discovery” instead of a life filled with suffering.
Let’s make it happen!
I know that we shouldn’t interpret Kabbalistic terms literally. It always points to an inner reality. At the same time, however, there is the rule that what is true for the particular is true for the general and vice versa. At the same time, the reality we see is always an expression of inner states.
So would it be accurate to say that the whole thing of having a person like Jeff Bezos that exploits the efforts of millions of people in his warehouses, factories etc. is the external expression of the internal state of “slavery beneath the Pharaoh”?
I think Pharaoh means “the epitome of egoism”, does it?
