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1) The fact that the Creator is responsible for EVERYTHING – “good” and “bad”.
2) The fact that we do have “free will”, but only in a very limited sense.
3) The fact that 2) – rather than upsetting me – is absolutely freeing, because there is no longer any need to experience guilt or shame.
4) The only error we can ever make is believing that there is any creator other than the Creator – and even that thought is given to us by the Creator so that we might learn from our mistake and cleave to Him even more tightly.
It is truly a closed system. Complete. Perfect. And perfectly mind blowing.
This has been an important week for me. Perhaps these things were building, perhaps the lessons triggered their release. Four things stand out from Week 1 of Part 2.
1. There is None Besides Him, and He resides in my own heart. The relationship I have growing in the Point in my Heart with the Creator consumes all my desire.
2. It is not important how I view other people, those not on my path. Everyone must travel their own journey, and time will take them where they are supposed to go. Focusing on my own journey is what matters now. The rest will fall into place. I can love all of them, for what they are and for who they will be eventually. We are all One.
3. What happened in the past was neither negative or detrimental to anyone, even though it appeared that way. No time or journey was wasted. I searched for a long time for Spirituality, all manner of divinity and even Kabbalah. When I reached the time of true hatred of the egoistic ways of my youth and adult life and truly opened my heart and begged the Creator to forgive me and show me the way to fix these things, I found KabU. They say, When the student is ready the teacher appears. Now I realize how blessed I am, to have been given these strong challenges that I have overcome in my heart. I do feel chosen, and appreciative of the great Joy that comes into my being every so often now.
4. The importance of being with others who are on the same path is starting to sink in. Finally I have participated in the Sunday Zoom session, and I walked away with such a feeling of connection, a feeling of Light that opened in my soul. I feel that connection here in online class and I crave my books as they return the same feeling, but being in that meeting has changed me.
Thank you everyone, instructors and students alike.
I’ve just read The Ari’s Poem – The Tree of Life, which caused an expansion in my heart and has inspired me to share an incredible Poem I found online a while back.  Author is unfortunately Unknown.  I pray it blesses the reader as it did me.
Vesica Pisces
The symbol of the fish, is not a symbol of a faith, but the symbol of a truth, not a creed, but a space, it’s the heart of the matter, the core of the Art, the equation of joining of parts.
The sign of the stars, is not a teller of fate, more a sign of the times, than the hinge of the gate, not a glimpse of the future, but the Ancient of Days, the revealing of the opening of ways.
Here is the door, Here … the space within a space, here is the core, Here the place within a place within a place, Â Here is the lore … Here is a trace of G_d.
The sum of the miracle, is not a time or a place, the arc of the circle, is not a line that we trace, But the sacred foundation, the axis of the art, that’s more than the sum of it’s parts.
The gematria is the numbering of life, the womb of forever, the husband the wife, the alchemical marriage, the binding of hearts … Revelation, the working, the start.
Here’s perception, Here the hand within a hand, Here conception, Here the land within a land within a land, Â Here perfection, Here is the face of G_d.
Draw the line and set the compass, the beyond beyond Divine, Chasing space, the Souls dividers, Â tracing secrets lost to time.
Here’s the magic, Here Creation’s golden cage, Here the mystic, Here the age within an age within an age, Here Majestic, Here is the space that is G_d.
The huge “aha” moment for me was to learn that God is the sole actor … and that He uses the doubts He places in me via thoughts and feelings of failure, hopelessness and despair at ever following His ways to actually strengthen my need to attain unity with Him. Beautiful! And the flip-side that when I do experience moments of connection with Him it is His doing, never mine. I found this wisdom both freeing and encouraging. And knowing that I can never attribute His reasons for pushing me away or drawing me near to Him to capriciousness … but only His unconditional love and desire to bestow me with the joy and peace and pleasure that far surpasses whatever we can experience in this world … really makes me glad that He is the Only One in control; certainly better than me, human authorities, religious leaders, or some rival force He battles or who I must battle!
400 and a bunch of zeros after it is what my brain is actually taking in, but I can only interpret about 2,000 pieces of that 400 something? That blew my mind. Like, where’s the door into that room with all that stuff, I want in…lol. No…maybe let me drink that in, a cup at a time. My primitive brain probably couldn’t take it all in at once.
I say that because I want to understand the source, where nothing else exists outside of that source. Believing that anything does is called ‘sin.’ Wow, big difference from all the indoctrination crammed down my throat during Catechism class, getting shamed because I didn’t have something memorized just right. It feels like a full paradigm shift. And the idea that pain and suffering are part of a correction to help steer us in the right direction. This helps me to understand and put into better perspectives those times I was ‘mad at God’ for letting so many horrible things happen.
I’d like to try to draw a parallel from my own experience that popped into my head while contemplating this question. I had and extraordinary bond with my grandmother when I was a very little girl. I loved her deeply and paid close attention to how she felt about me. When she gave me something, of course I was happy and thankful for it. But looking above the receiving pleasure, seeing the smile and love coming from my grandma meant more to me. I hope this is in line with what I’m learning here.
The one thing that made me change my perspective somewhat, and my approach, was learning about the true meaning of Sin, what Sin really is.
Of course I see that this is because of how unaware I have been about the completeness of the extend of There is None Else besides Him, but for some reason it was still more striking to learn about what Sin is. – I can see why the understanding of what true Sin is, ought to have been equally obvious and instant as the understand of There is None Else Besides Him, but for some reason it just wasn’t.
Another thing that strikes me is to Receive In Order to Give. I have for years been doing things a little differently: I’ve been giving, full well knowing that I was receiving when doing so. I did it anyway because I couldn’t see any way to give that doesn’t have an aspect of egoism. – So this is something I just happened to find out about early in life and long before I learned anything about Kabbalah … I’m sure we all have little things like this in our lives’ experiences.
I continued to give because I thought that gaining some egoistic satisfaction from it was worth it because I was giving in the process. And now, after reading about receiving in order to give, I’m thinking that the two ways are basically the same thing, just viewed from different angles because in a sense I Was receiving in order to give by giving and receiving in the process, and because I did get satisfaction from the very action of giving.
I hope this all makes sense…..Thank you for taking the time to read, or skim through, this.
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