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When I was little I had questions about what happens when we die. I was freaking out, having nightmares and finally asked my mom. She told me to think about where I was before I was born and this appeased me. Around the same time I had a meltdown at the Oyster Festival. Everything was grey and meaningless, I remember saying I didn’t want to go home and I didn’t want to stay there. My mom bought me a turtle thing and it calmed me down.
Along the way I doubted everything, I would have to figure it all out. It wasn’t until I found a teacher (Rav) that I heard a message my heart could accept.sice I was a child I had this questions , wondering about all in nature, the son, sky trees, plants, animals , the seasons, asked my parents for answers , reading books and followed different ways ( meditation, yoga, etc to receive answers and reach spirituality ;and finally I discover Kabbalah .  I thought it was by accident but I know now better . All is in the hand of the Creator .I will continue study Kabbalah to find solutions, answers, its now the most important in my live. and try building good connections and follow the path of Kabbalah
About 13 years ago I HAD to go on a spiritual quest, but before that I had some strange, I could say mystical, experiences from my very young age. I was searching for answers in Philosophy, Occult sciences, Eastern teachings, Shamanism even Kabbalah (not this Kabbalah, you know all those 4000+ results on Amazon; that Kabbalah 😊), I must admit that about 5 years ago I stumbeled upon THIS Kabbalah, but it didn’t click… And I had a big rejection of Western religious techings (which in my mind included, Kabbalah too; but now I know it’s a science). But about 2 years ago something in me said that there is a reason I was born in the west. I went back to THIS Kabbalah and it clicked. I’ve read a lot of online texts in kabbalah.info library, watched kabbalahinfo youtube… up to a point that I saw that I can’t progress on my own any longer. Then I finally joined KabU and now I’m here.
Pain, and regrowth. I went through a lot before entering into Kaballah. Unanswered questions, answered questions with no reality in the question. Religious institutions that told me to think this way and not expanding my perceptions other than that. It was really hard to learn and so my malchut in a sense was not ready to receive all the light that this system of learning is offering. I am learning though which is a sign I’m beginning to heal from the way of thinking I came from.
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