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My goal for studying Kabbalah is ascend the Tree of Life so I can experience coherence with creation and the Creator because I feel that this is the only reason for living.
At this point in my study of Kabbalah freedom and the Reforming light is yet to be revealed in my awareness. My ego sees freedom as moving through my life as my authentic self without concern or worry over how my basic needs shall be met. I have no desire to chase wealth or power or knowledge for the sake of societal acceptance. This was not always true, I have chased all these things. My ego has chased love in the most selfish ways manipulating men I loved to adore me and I looked to them to fill the emptiness in me and when they could not I left them mercilessly. I sought to take their freedom from them to cling to me. Kabbalah has revealed this to me and I am ready to accept and give love unconditionally without attachment. What is coming into view is a letting go of what my ego wants to explore what Spirit wants. Perhaps this is the spark of what freedom is.
Seth I interpret your reply in the context of what we learned in semester 1 – the Epstein example is the path of pain that ultimately leads to correction as does the path of light. This is true because the law of equivalence is absolute. We see evidence of this truth in the four stages of development. At first it appears beyond reason until it is viewed from this perspective. Although I may not like the answer I do accept it and see the beauty in it.
My question may have trigger warning as it relates to crimes against humanity as we are reminded of the Epstein global cabal of pedophilic parasite billionaire class in recent news.
I would like to understand how these  heinous acts against babies children girls and women are the work of the Creator? Yes it is a stark contrast between right and wrong but what justification does Kabbalah provide to explain the suffering and death that has ensued from not only this wave of greed and self important indulgence but all such waves in human history?
At the end of the 5 lights clip it was said the creator or source is inclusive of everything – fulfills and exists – depending upon point of view understand if the creator exists in me while including and being the all then it makes sense the creator is also in and existing everywhere else – hence there is not other beside Him
There was a moment when thru study of Kabbalah I realized that not one person place or thing could change the way the Creator loves me and for that matter everyone else. As long as I live to be pleased and to please the Creator alone nothing stands between that love and nothing can or will ever change it. I was unexpectedly RIFd after 17 years before retirement age last week at a time when I had put my house on the market preparing for a change I sensed was coming and at the same time travelling far from home to stay with my daughter who is recovering from a car accident. Literally I am suspended in midair – and I am not afraid. I am not planning worrying or freaking out-rather I am seeing how a new life has been given to explore. If not for Kabbalah if not for the creators love that remains ever present I am certain my reaction would be much different.
