Forum Replies Created
- Replies
I’m not sure I know anymore. I don’t seem to have freedom from desiring objects, sensations, feelings or states. And I don’t seem to have the freedom to be that which does not desire but bestows. How do I do that? That is also a desire. Do I just fake it, ’til I make it? Read on. I guess this is where I need to be in some environment of others who might be fakin’ it better than I.     Mm, I should have watched the little video above first. Be in a community where people are focussing within rather than without and asking what the purpose of (their) life is. That both sounds like very little and an awful lot. I think I have some way to go yet.
I’m not sure I know anymore. I don’t seem to have freedom from desiring objects, sensations, feelings or states. And I don’t seem to have the freedom to be that which does not desire but bestows. How do I do that? That is also a desire. Do I just fake it, ’til I make it? Read on. I guess this is where I need to be in some environment of others who might be fakin’ it better than I.
I have followed many paths without really being committed to arriving anywhere. I have accomplished many things and achieved nothing. My life has been one long drift without true direction or purpose. My goal is to have a goal, to tread a path with purpose, to evolve, change, transform to something better, to reach fulfilment and completion, wholeness. Plenty of desire, not much action and even less bestowal here, unfortunately.
By trying to understand, to feel and to be one with the Giver, the Creator. As the Will the Receive, I am there to serve as a vehicle of contrast by which the Light, the Will to Bestow might be known. To try to tangibly feel, experience, that which I am part through that which is the Light within me, the Point in the Heart.
It has taken me a lifetime of forked paths, cul-de-sacs and false dawns to reach this ‘point’ (which KR1 made me recognise has always been here).
I expect to learn how to proceed in changing my intention and begin to do so.
This course has not been what I expected. I can see parallels with other ‘spiritual stuff’ I have dabbled in to answer the big questions. But ultimately I have been kidding myself that I am somehow special. I have been feeding a self-image without really getting to grips with that inner yearning because it would have meant taking a cold hard look at myself. Here we have a scientific practical process by which I can nurture the ‘point in the heart’. I wish my fellow students love, light and revelation.
