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Of course it’s all known in the Thought of Creation what will be. It’s all so that the Created Being will clarify where it is free and where it is not free. It has to first falsely believe it is free so that it can find out what freedom isn’t. So freedom isn’t where all my actions are secretly operated by the Upper Force and I realize my inclination without asking any questions.
Without Restriction, there is no Created Being that is distinct from the Upper Force. Instead, the Upper Force is doing absolutely everything, activating every move one makes. Moreover, one remains as a Desire to Receive that is the polar opposite of the Upper Force, which is a bestowing force.
Of course I understand, Tracey. I can barely stand the presence of my own blood relatives, let alone anyone else, not to mention anyone across the internet with whom I have no apparent reason to connect. I practically don’t value any human interactions, and don’t even get me started on small talk. For me, to have lunch with someone else requires serious preparation to imitate the kinds of expressions and actions that make people think you like being in their company. In truth, if you put me in a private jail cell, but with books, I’d be ok for the rest of my life. I don’t think you’re that antisocial.
Needless to say, when I came to the wisdom of Kabbalah I did not come to connect. In fact, I disregarded any mention of it as some sort of extraneous relic of some, perhaps, Jewish moral code that was irrelevant to the core of the wisdom. In short, it’s nearly impossible for anyone to be as introverted, anitsocial, arrogant and dense as I was.
It is natural, by the way, for a person with great spiritual potential to be anti-connection. It doesn’t matter if it manifests in arrogance or shyness or angst. The Will To Receive, the more pronounced it’s opposite will turn out to be – that is, the more potential it has for the quality of the Creator, bestowal – the more aimed inward it will be. Meaning, it’s a heavier will to receive. If I have a small will to receive, I can flutter about like a butterfly, I can go out to others easily and practically without even a clear reason to. But if I have a big desire to receive for self, I will be decisively aimed inward, not out towards others. And that’s why, in a (seeming contradiction) spiritual work can be – I don’t want to say easier but…it will be sharper. Because my ego doesn’t allow me to go towards others without a clear purpose. Nothing short of the goal of Creation, that through this action I’ll reveal the Upper Worlds, will suffice. This also means that before I do an action of connection, I will have to line up all the reasons I’m doing so and what I want from this action. This is very important.
All that said, you’ll find that the group work is not like any interaction you’ve had with others. It’s purposeful, very directed. We know exactly what we’re doing – it’s a kind of a game that we all know we’re playing. I or another instructor will be there with you. There’s really nothing to fear.
Nobody sees it that way, that the Creator constantly bestows good upon the world. I think the world is enough of a fishbowl now, and if we don’t see or feel it, there are enough reality shows to make it clear that even the very rich are also not enjoying this world. The enjoyment that is left for people is that if you have it worse than me, that in itself is pleasure for me. And besides that, there’s nothing. This is what we’d conclude if we checked each and everyone in the world. The fact that the Creator constantly bestows – well, what He bestows actually causes us to feel even greater darkness. Because He bestows that He brings us closer to His quality, and if we don’t prepare the proper vessels for that, then this feels the opposite of good. That’s why the world isn’t getting better, it’s feeling worse and worse the more we try to remain in ancient forms of enjoyment. Now the time has come to develop vessels of bestowal, and then we will feel the Creator’s goodness.
That doesn’t refer to our world. It doesn’t mean that the universe was dark with only cosmic dust and then the sun came out, or something like that. This refers to the development of the Desire to Receive, without which there is nothing in which the pleasure (the Light) can be felt. So, the beginning is the creation of the desire that is essentially one with the Light. That is, the instant it wants, the fulfillment is already inside, such that the Light and the Vessel are indistinguishable, like a mother with her newborn. It’s not even considered receiving when the baby breastfeeds. In fact, the mom gets all the delight by the fact that her baby is eating and the baby has no identity separate from his mother. Now, we’re many degrees after that state. We have our own Desire to Receive and the Upper Force does not automatically fulfill it. Now we need to develop an Intention for why we receive. That sounds simple however it’s the entire wisdom of Kabbalah that is needed just for this.
