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Hi Lucy,
You connect with everyone you need to – family, of course; possibly co-workers, neighbors as much as is normal and necessary. But where you can make a spiritual connection is specifically in the Kabbalistic group, with people that you don’t know in any other context.
Though it seems related, this is completely unrelated to the wisdom of Kabbalah because with those who are in your family you do not have even the beginnings of a spiritual relationship. I have with my family essentially the equivalent of what lions or monkeys have. If you get along, it won’t bring spiritual benefit; if you don’t, it won’t bring spiritual harm. Spirituality is another dimension entirely. Better to not even connect the two. On the level of this world, family and such, you don’t need spiritual advice. In fact, the most spiritual will be to behave there as if there is no spirituality, no Kabbalah. Then, decide what would be the best, most normal, effective approach to this person? To what efforts on your part would they respond well? Once you’ve made the scrutinies, along these lines, and your efforts, it could be that you can’t have a relationship with them, for now.
A descent is a new level of coarseness (desire) that has been revealed, over which I lack Faith (bestowal) and have to establish it. Faith is the ability be above the desire, called corporeality.
All our actions are going to be in varying degrees of Lo Lishma. We want to steal more and more from the Will to Receive, getting it to work one way or another. Generally what you describe sounds like a good direction, there should be joy in the work toward the Creator. If we refine the intention more in quality then we always find the place where the Will to Receive disagrees, and we need the Creator.
