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While as I grew up as a boy, it was shown to me that this ‘reality’ I was in, was in fact not reality at all, but an illusion, a false reality if you will. My goal from the tender age of 11 years was to discover the true reality, which I was lead to believe would involve the encounter with my G-d, blessed is his name. This was the true reality and over my life I have tried to imagine just what this reality would look like but despite a giant imagination I still can not perceive just what life with my G-d in the eternal worlds would look like or be like. I am so tired of suffering I feel lost at times and would surrender if not for the fact that I know there is something more beautiful out there than what I presently perceive. At 63 and not in the best of health, how much further can I go? I am but at the beginning and yet it feels like the end, however I am confidant that the G-d , hallowed be his name will give me exactly what I need in these last days for me, and I shall be happy and content to the best of my ability. Thank you, Shalom.
One last question for me today please. As I began to delve into Kabbalah I purchased a library of books which were recommended for the study of Kabbalah, Torah and the Zohar. For example I have the book Deresh HaShem written by the RaM’Hal and the 2 companion books of explanations of the work. I also have the Babylonian Talmud, The syangouge edition of the Siddur ect, ect but now I wonder with the teachings of Baal HaSulam, does these books have any value in our lives today? Would they be worth the effort to explore as a compainion to the teachings of Baal HaSulam?
How doe one correctly apply his ego for the purpose of correction in ones life, to make a better place for himself and for the others around us? Kabbalah is introducing me to an entirely new concept of ego and how it works and I desprately wish to learn more about how the ego functions and what I can do to use it for ultruistic purposes?
wow, this is really a fine line and suggests we have a choice of how ‘much’ ego we posses and how difficult we wish to make the journey over those mountains. I wish for example to cleave unto the G-d, blessed is his name, in a deeply meaningful way, does this mean that I should build up huge ego in order to overcome it and be worthy of such a connection to the G-d, hallowed be his name.?
It never ceases to amaze me just how willing we are to look for the easier, softer way of things. As I studied through this first weeks material, I was surprised at just how difficult wisdom and it’s attainment could be. I used to think that if one pursued knowledge for knowledge’s sake then in time, perhaps in my senior years I would just possess wisdom, but this is not so. Ignorance is easy, gaining knowledge is easy, but wisdom, is a full contact sport that one must work diligently upon in order to acquire. My whole life has been about the search for a meaningful, personal, relationship with the G-d, blessed is his name. I knew very early in life that this world was false and there was much more beyond my reach. I feel deeply that I came into this world prepared to discover Torah, Kabbalah, Zohar, but it took 50 years of pain and suffering to find it and then I realise the journey into Kabbalah will be more difficult than I ever imagined. The world needs this wonderful wisdom, and time is short. I therefore say a prayer for all living beings, PLEASE grasp onto the stick and work towards a better future here in this world now, the rewards that await our success here is beyond all imagination and we are each worthy to cleave unto the G-d, hallowed be his name. Thank you Shalom
I have been deeply invested in the study of the Torah, Zohar, Kabbalah, for the past couple years. I have a copy, in paraphase of the Zohar and have enjoyed reading The RA’MhaL as well as the Ari. After a 50 years search for the supernal wisdom of the G-d, blessed is his name, he dropped me off at the doorstep of Judaism and I have never been more please. I wish to establish a solid study effort in my small effort to understand the horror of my ego and the possibility of correction.When a younger man I thought I knew what Utopian was but that was long ago. I am happy to be able to have a study in this acient and most correct wisdom, know to people. Shalom
