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Hello, I’m Phil and I live in the Yukon. I have always had a desire for supernal knowledge and wisdom, since I was a boy. I found and began to study and learn Kabbalah, Torah, Zohar some 3 years ago and I honestly believe that this is the only real wisdom humankind posses. I have the soncino edition of Zohar, and it is wonderful. Looking forward to the study.
Shalom
I don’t know if I can answer this question with any real confidence as I am at the beginning of Kabbalah studies, though I have been searching for it a lifetime. I have come to realise that every single event both good and bad that has occured in my life has been the product of my own ego. Even in those moments that I felt I was doing something good, it was just my ego expressing itself for my own benefit, and I have found it very difficult to break away from this behavior. I was taken by the words of Rabbi Luzzato, The RaM’HaL, when he stated that the G-d made ‘ALL’ things in existence for our benefit, to teach us how to overcome our egoisms and cleave unto the G-d. I have learned that I have been lost and the forces of the world has held me in subjugation since the day of my birth. My deepest hope is that through Kabbalah I may come to have a deeper understanding of these forces and thier impact upon my life and how to make the corrections neccesary to rise above this and achieve and equivalence of form with the G-d. To become totally ultruistic. Shalom.
We have no desire for it. We cannot give be
cause
we are made of a will to receive; recep
tion
is our substance, our Matter.
Now, this latter reason is more complex than it may
seem at first. When Kabbalists write that all we want is
to receive, they don’t mean that all we do is receive, but
that this is the underlying motivation behind everything
we do. They phrase it very plainly: If it doesn’t give us
pleasure, we can’t do it. It’s not only that we don’t want
to; we literally can’t. This is because the Creator (Nature)
created us with only a will to receive, because all He wants
is to give. Therefore, we need not change our actions, but
only the underlying motivation behind them.So what is the correct motivation to have in order to correctly ‘receive’ bestowel from the creator. If our matter, our substance, our will to receive is set as is the creators matter, the will to bestow, why would we need to change our underlying motivation? Is there some unique quality in the change of our motivation to receive bestowel?
While as I grew up as a boy, it was shown to me that this ‘reality’ I was in, was in fact not reality at all, but an illusion, a false reality if you will. My goal from the tender age of 11 years was to discover the true reality, which I was lead to believe would involve the encounter with my G-d, blessed is his name. This was the true reality and over my life I have tried to imagine just what this reality would look like but despite a giant imagination I still can not perceive just what life with my G-d in the eternal worlds would look like or be like. I am so tired of suffering I feel lost at times and would surrender if not for the fact that I know there is something more beautiful out there than what I presently perceive. At 63 and not in the best of health, how much further can I go? I am but at the beginning and yet it feels like the end, however I am confidant that the G-d , hallowed be his name will give me exactly what I need in these last days for me, and I shall be happy and content to the best of my ability. Thank you, Shalom.
