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To install means to be as a recording device. Put it in your box. Even if you don’t remember it, it enters, will be there when you need it.
What to ask? Ask not to be disconnected from your ten. I heard Rav Laitman say that this is what he would ask for. Even Rav, a great Kabbalist, this is what he wants.
I never heard my teacher give us work with “the Light and the Klipot.” We don’t have those details in our senses. We have the ten – our spiritual group – and the Upper Light. I also don’t know what the Upper Light is. So, I only have the ten. But if I long for connection with them, though I don’t really want it, I discover that there is a force that can bring me from completely locked within myself to the wide spaces of love of friends – and that’s a miracle. So let’s say the Upper Light, I can say I know about, or will soon. I also know I have a force in me that doesn’t want this connection, even if it will be good, great, sublime – but is that the Klipot? We can say losely, conversationally, sure – but it’s not really. Because Klipot are actually only against the spiritual worlds of Assiya, Yetzira, Beria, against each degree of kedusha [holiness], a klipa. It’s something out there in the real world and not some exercises given inside the kindergarten. So, it’s better we relate to these forces realistically, according to what we know about them, and not to tack on some names from the Upper World. The ten, the Upper Force, the ego that goes against the connection, and my contrasting prayer for connection. Some of what we read is mainly for the Surrounding Light, and not that we can truly work with those.
If something helps you think of the Creator, that’s good. It’s a question still if it is putting me in closer proximity to actual spiritual states. Because people think all kinds of things are close to spiritual. But actually the Point in the Heart is not just some tendency but it is the backside of the backside of the first spiritual degree, and this drives a person exactly toward the authentic wisdom of Kabbalah, in its cleanest possible form. If I have this property, which is an alien property, the quality of Bina, at least to some extent, then my music could transmit that to some extent. If I don’t have this quality, then it’s not my music that makes you think of the Creator, but something that was already in you, from your studies, environment, etc.
Even scientists today are saying that EVERYTHING you see, including your own body, is a projection of… well, that they don’t know, but Kabbalists say it’s of the Will to Receive.
Questions are not a chore for us.
But I think this text is not so much for study, but for a person to read and install it in their heart. It’s so revealed and direct that there’s nothing else to say. So, there are opposites there. If there aren’t opposites somewhere in the wisdom of Kabbalah, it only means the Kabbalist didn’t mention it, for now. To add to this would be as if the teacher arranged everything on the desk for the student, who has nothing left but to lift the crayon, and the mom jumps in and colors the picture for the child.
No, the path of Kabbalah is joyous. If I am a world traveler, some CIA guy, I’m in some horribly inconvenient place. Would you like to go to the mountains of Yemen and maybe get into a battle, nearly die, and so on? He would. Or if I get into a cold plunge, I’m not wanting it warm or lukewarm – I’m looking forward to how cold it will be. If I wasn’t looking for that, it’d be terrible suffering, but just seeing it through another lens makes it the highlight of my day. A Kabbalist feels himself like a gamer who finally gets to play his game, the only thing he wanted to be doing. All the time, he is in joy. That’s if you’re relating to the path correctly at each stage, deeply integrated in the ten, the lessons.
Would you be more inclined at each stage, though, the more you advance, the more the ego grows, to put the correction off till later, and accordingly be subject to more blows? Here there is a question.
If you ask technical questions I can answer. How one feels in each state, Baal HaSulam doesn’t explain. Generally, too, we won’t be right in our imagination of it. It’s good to yearn for these states. But I can’t confirm it’s like this or like that. Sometimes there is an analogy, like with the guest and the host, but that’s Baal HaSulam’s example, so I’m comfortable using it.
