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Hi there,
I posted in the other forum recently regarding our preparation question for this week and realized as I was writing it my response itself was actually a question. I’ll repost it here:
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Ultimately the goal is adhesion with the Creator – but the practical steps to attain this seem to change depending on the level of spiritual progress we are on.
It seems that for now, in the preparation stage where there is no perception of the Creator whatsoever, the goal is constantly aspire to Him and the desire to bestow in order to draw the Reforming Light. The Reforming Light can then do for us what we cannot do for ourselves, namely generating the first truly altruistic desire in us which provides with the screen.
Is it correct to say that the aim of our work differs before and after the acquisition of the screen? While it would seem to be true that the growing of an aspiration for the Creator should remain constant throughout, the goal in the preparation seems to be exclusively to draw Reforming Light. Where as it seems as if after the acquisition of the screen, the aspiration towards the Creator becomes a process with more input from the Creature, for example – the individual correction of egoistic desires as they appear and a constant back and forth process between the Creator and Creature to reject/reflect Light egoistically and accept it altruistically.
Hopefully this makes sense as it’s a bit confusing reading this back..
Ultimately the goal is adhesion with the Creator – but the practical steps to attain this seem to change depending on the level of spiritual progress we are on.
It seems that for now, in the preparation stage where there is no perception of the Creator whatsoever, the goal is constantly aspire to Him and the desire to bestow in order to draw the Reforming Light. The Reforming Light can then do for us what we cannot do for ourselves, namely generating the first truly altruistic desire in us which provides with the screen.
I know this forum section isn’t monitored for Q&A, so I’ll probably repost this in the next forum to check whether this is correct as I’m not entirely sure.
Hi there
I know this may be somewhat of a loaded question, as Bnei Baruch hosts and encourages the virtual environment for the study of Kabbalah, but do you feel that the virtual environments are as effective as something in person?
Almost 12 years ago when I first discovered Kabbalah, I found an in-person group that was associated to Bnei Baruch right here in the city that I live in. I attended one meeting, but unfortunately during that period of my life I wasn’t quite ready to engage with the group as the Creator had other plans for developing my soul.
Today I looked up on Google Maps whether the place still existed, and it appeared that it did. But when I went over to the building I discovered that the group no longer met in person after COVID-19, and the host of the group had since moved to Israel.
We have the Kabbalah Centre here in Los Angeles, but I have been there before and find that there is something less authentic / more mainstream about it, but maybe I am mistaken in this assumption. Should I continue to seek out a local group that studies this wisdom, maybe by even stopping by the Kabbalah Centre again? Or is virtual studies and group sessions truly sufficient to build the connections needed to break the spiritual barrier?
Thanks again for all of your hard work
Hi there
It’s interesting how this process of spiritual development tends to work out. During times of ascent and elation, the material seems to click and connect to reality in a very personal and direct way. But during times of descent and confusion, the contradictions seem to pile on the more I continue to read.
It is said here in this article that not even a persons doubts or deviations from the work are of his own doing, because such would imply that the Creator is not omnipotent. But Kabbalah also seems to frequently assert that it is up to us how we form our reactions to the Creator and his actions, and that our success or failure in this area determines our spiritual progress.
It’s possible we may have covered the free will subject already, so forgive me if I am asking the instructors to drum up a repetitive answer – but what is actually our part in our spiritual development? It feels like a paradox, in that we must exert ourselves to the fullest in order to cultivate the desire for altruism and reject egoism with all of our might – yet be completely and totally detached to results of any of our efforts because it is exclusively up to the Creator regarding the state of our revelation of Him.
You can see why this might be discouraging especially in times of spiritual descent.
Thank you again for all of your efforts
Every now and then I’d get these ‘mini-revelations’ where things would internally just click, reality would feel whole, and for the first time in over a decade of being in and out of the desire for spirituality and Kabbalah, I would feel that I’m making some sort of spiritual progress.
On the other hand, the spiritual lows I’ve experienced so far I’ve been able to attribute directly to egoism and its manifestations – which before this course and Kabbalah in general, would tend to baffle me.
Honestly, this process has been a bit frustrating – maybe in a good way though. It just seems that, the more I even attempt to feel, think, intend, or even commit actions that are seemingly altruistic – the more I feel that it is absolutely impossible to do so. Even worse when I simply don’t want to think of others, or anything outside of myself. It’s difficult because egoistic pleasures are still at times enjoyable and I, against my better wisdom, feel that they are worth chasing from time to time. But deep down I know that this will forever keep me from experiencing the Creator.
In fact, it almost feels as if even the desire for the Creator is in and of itself egoistic. Do I actually want a relationship with the Creator in a selfless way? Or do I actually just want spiritual pleasures? How can I ever get myself to NOT want spiritual pleasures? How could I possibly ever even attempt to live in a way that is completely against my nature for not even any reward of spiritual revelation?
Even the voicing of this comment/complaint feels self centered. It just seems that becoming altruistic, let alone being able to receive altruistically, is a completely impossible task. I don’t understand to what degree of impossibility must I delve into to grant the blessing of the Creator or how much further I must struggle with egoism before I can affected by the Light that Reforms?
With that being said, I have learned that Egoism is pervasive and insistent and essentially the root of my entire being. I hope for all other students engaged in this study finds the strength to overcome this. Thanks again for making this course so available.
