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Connect and serve others and help them reach their spiritual desires before one’s own. Far easier said than done.
I am aware that the light takes a long time to change a person and it happens gradually despite how fast we want the light to change us. Like I have wished always; I am hoping that I can start to sense what the light is trying to change in me and help it along without my inquiring mind and ego begin to push back.
I know what I have to correct, but I also know that correction can only come from above as answers to prayers. My desire this semester is to have my prayers answered and let the correction and change begin.
What struck me the most was the second concealment, and the push by the Creator toward the creature to leave the path even for those who are trying so hard to find the purpose of life. It makes me wonder as to WHY? It probably leaves many creatures wondering and puzzled to know if this pushback is a rejection due to lack of “Equivalence of Form”, or the Creator wants the creature to come even closer for a higher purpose? Either way, it hurts! and gives the ego lots of openings.
Another issue that keeps coming to thought is the idea that the Creator is inside the body, and out there at the same time. This makes it a bit difficult to reveal Him as one is lost at which way should the person direct their yearning for being closer to Him. Maybe it is part of the concealment and done purposefully, or maybe it cannot be attained by the mind.
I was surprised how much I missed the first time I took this class, and despite watching it several times I notice that each time I see something different.
It reminded me with the video by Gil Shir about missing the gorilla while counting how many times the white team passed the ball. This taught me to watch out for selective attention.
I wish for all the other students is what I wish for myself, which is to attain the teaching correctly.
Very good question! the only issue is, I absolutely have No Idea. When I was a child growing up in Damascus, I was told and taught by that society that Israel (the state) was my enemy that took the land by force. In the 2 wars of 1967 and 1973 I was a child huddled in the basement from the sounds of the jets, the bombing, and bullets seeking shelter from conflict around me that I had no idea how it started, but hope that it will end. Something inside was telling me that I should leave and I was lucky to manage it. Leaving everything behind was difficult and hard, first to Europe then a chance to reached America in 1978. When legally got here, I thought I had arrived at my destination, but it was not so. I encountered other difficulties related to my heritage and still do today.
I found Kabbalah in Oct 2019, I have not been able to stop learning it, but find it extremely difficult to belong to a group that I was taught as a child that it is the enemy that caused all my trouble. In fact, I find it very difficult to belong to any group and trust them as having the answer for me, because if I believed in the environment that I grew up in as a child, I would have grown up as someone who is dedicated to the destruction of a society that has the in it the seed of the first teaching that touched my heart (Benai Baruch).
I feel ashamed for hating the State of Israel before 2019 and blamed it for my shuttered life as I was taught and told by my environment; I feel guilty for abandoning the culture I grew up in despite the lies they told me; I feel that I have failed despite what America calls a great success of coming from nothing and managed a good life; I find it hard to trust any group and count heavily on my mind and reasoning which had steered me away from all the trouble that I was born to live in. But there is something in me that cannot stop reaching for the teaching, and a HOPE through prayers that I can overcome all these difficulties some day. All that brings me to the question: what is my Role? which can only be found by knowing the Purpose of my life, and the answer is: I have no idea.
Every time I approach the study and commit to, I get that PUSH that Toni talked about in week 4 (second concealment) which sends me thinking, is this the push from the Creator to bring me closer, or I just do not have the Point in the Heart that is required as a precondition to be part of this group? So I am left with doubts frozen between earth and heaven and hoping that my prayers will be answered and finally show me my Role and which fork in the road He wants me to take to reach the ultimate goal? After all, I am told that “..There is none else beside Him…”
I found the spiritual classification of Palaces, Robes, Noga, Angels, and Souls somehow intriguing. I often am mad at people for being insensitive, unkind, prejedeous, cruel, and nasty and walk by them as if they did not exist and try very hard to avoid those characters so I do not lose my temper with them and make things a bit ugly. However, I often attributed these characters to the corporal world of inanimate, vegetative, animate and barely human, now, I can see that there are 5 more classification above that I need to introduce to my understanding about friendlier people. I thought I had a lot of corrections to do before the lesson, now I see that my work on correction had just doubled.
